Top Ten Signs You Might Be a CrazyQuilter

10. You collected bits of lace, velvet, silk and satin for “twenty” years before you actually made a crazy quilt.

9. You’ve suffered from nightmares where you see headlines in the local paper:  “Husband Smothered in Freak Accident in Wife’s Sewing Closet.”

8. You’ve threatened to cut off men’s silk ties to build your fabric stash.

7. Your heart goes pitter-patter when someone mentions S.E.X. (Stash Enhancement eXperience)

6. When your husband offers to take you out to a romantic candle-lit dinner or a bead store, “Beads” win . . . hands down.

5. You stalk people in Salvation Army and Good Will stores hoping they’ll put those silk garments back on the rack.

4. You’ve gone to bed with pins stuck in your pajamas and found them by accident at 4:00 a.m.

3. Your husband insists on “thread-check” before allowing you to leave the house with him.  (He makes you stand with arms raised above your head rotating in a 360 degree circle so he can pick threads off you from embarrassing places)

2. You “often” feel a need to discuss the many “degrees of bling” on a crazy quilt…oh wait….look, something “shiny”.

AND the #1 Sign You Might Be a CrazyQuilter is:

1. You’ve followed someone dressed in a gorgeous outfit at the mall, contemplating how you could cut a swatch of fabric out of the back of the garment . . . and wondered if you got caught, would the acquisition of “said” material be worth jail time?

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  1. Comment by Sherrill Lewis:

    Too, too funny — and I can totally relate.

    Now one more addendum: If nearly every horizontal surface in your house (or studio, if you MUST stay contained) is covered with bits of this & that, left from a mad scramble to get a CQ done, or the lovely mess ilies waiting for the CQ Muse to poke her head through the glimmery bits for further mischief, mayhem and marauding …. ahhh.

    As Pooh Bear said so elegantly : “One of the advantages of being disorderly is the joy of discovery.”

  2. Comment by Cherry Petersen:

    Oh Kate, you are so funny. Just found this. You know I relate to everything you’ve said. Takes one to know one of whatever we are. lol You are now in my “favorites” although you’ve been a favorite of mine for some time now. ;^)

  3. Comment by Freda Butler:

    Hi Kate

    Long time no talk. I have missed seeing you girls. I am hoping to go to St. Louis again this year and maybe we will connect up there. I will go on my blog in the next couple of days and give yours a push. I will mention the charity quilts and please let me know when you are going to post them and I can talk about that also.

    We are still in Florida and are leaving for Chicago May 7. Hoping all this crazy weather will disappear before we leave. Don’t much like driving a couple of days in rain and tornadoes whipping around us.

    Hope your Mom is doing okay.



  4. Comment by Cynthia Green:

    Boy, I see myself in a lot of these.

    Very funny, Kate.

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