10. You collected bits of lace, velvet, silk and satin for “twenty” years before you actually made a crazy quilt.
9. You’ve suffered from nightmares where you see headlines in the local paper: “Husband Smothered in Freak Accident in Wife’s Sewing Closet.”
8. You’ve threatened to cut off men’s silk ties to build your fabric stash.
7. Your heart goes pitter-patter when someone mentions S.E.X. (Stash Enhancement eXperience)
6. When your husband offers to take you out to a romantic candle-lit dinner or a bead store, “Beads” win . . . hands down.
5. You stalk people in Salvation Army and Good Will stores hoping they’ll put those silk garments back on the rack.
4. You’ve gone to bed with pins stuck in your pajamas and found them by accident at 4:00 a.m.
3. Your husband insists on “thread-check” before allowing you to leave the house with him. (He makes you stand with arms raised above your head rotating in a 360 degree circle so he can pick threads off you from embarrassing places)
2. You “often” feel a need to discuss the many “degrees of bling” on a crazy quilt…oh wait….look, something “shiny”.
AND the #1 Sign You Might Be a CrazyQuilter is:
1. You’ve followed someone dressed in a gorgeous outfit at the mall, contemplating how you could cut a swatch of fabric out of the back of the garment . . . and wondered if you got caught, would the acquisition of “said” material be worth jail time?
- Boy, I see myself in a lot of these. Very funny, Kate.
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